.....

All my friends and loved ones have told me to take care of my body, but it feels kind of good to abuse myself physically by lack of sleep and food. I feel like it alters my state of mind, numbing me so I can get through the day. So many emotions, I can't even tell you. So many secrets kept, even dating back to the times I thought we were happy together. I guess my love was never prized, even though he fought so hard for me. He fought for selfish reasons while I fought for him. Feeling your heart break again every day is torture; I can't explain what goes through my head. If you're reading this and believe in miracles, please pray.